The L Word

Life. Don’t talk to me about Life.

Listen:

The days drift in and out of each other like the soapy water at my feet, sliding down the drain.

Suns rise. Rain falls. Like, A LOT.

The flat (very, very flat) landscape stretches out beyond the strange words and phrases and eerily similar pace of life.

And quite suddenly – it’s been six years.

I remember the day, the night, the moment. those precious wee hours, huddled together on the couch.

And it all feels like a whole lifetime ago.

It is easier to hide it all away, how much it hurts to be away. To keep it bottled up. 

To face the mirror, see the reflection, knowing it knows what i know. 

I am missing so much, everyday. 

The milestones and important days. The moments of clarity and sparks of imagination. The tears and the joys.

The comfort of your sanity and stability not lying next to you.

It kills me. All the time. So i try to keep it together.

Listen – there is an end date. This won’t last forever. It is a minor interruption in our regularly scheduled programming.

So i’ll stack up the days, side by side, like a line of heroes facing the music. Transform them into a fluid string of experience and opportunity, and recognize it will be all ok.

I’m hugging you all. I’m holding you tight. Everyday, as i walk through my life away from My Life.

You are all in my heart.

You are all my Life.

I love you.

Ah jeez, dry your eyes, already.