Humane Society

So the world is going to shit, if you haven’t noticed.

Conflicting reports regarding the treatment by and of Syrian refugees flooding into Europe is a hot topic, and no one seems to know what the right answer is.

ISIS is on the verge of becoming a serious global threat, if you are prone to that kind of pandering.

North America is ignorant and blind to the rest of the world and what is truly going on. The environment is melting around us, the aliens are manipulating our leaders, and pop stars dictate interpersonal ethics.

Apparently, this is the part of those popular movies that describes the early 21st Century as dark, dystopic and fraught with oppression and angst.

There are enough side by side comparisons of modern day Japan and “Blade Runner” to make the point.

Things are bad all over.

Should a persons personal religious beliefs give them accommodations when doing their job? Historically, no. But we aren’t talking about history. We are talking about right now, and right now, the world is quickly filling up with all kinds of fanatics.

Fanaticism is not the sole property of religion, mind you.

We have the 1%, who are fanatical about keeping the economic structure of modern civilization the way it is because, let’s face it, they have all the money.

We have the faceless hordes of the computer savvy and not so savvy operating clandestine operations from behind keyboards, doling out vigilante justice to whomever comes up on their radar.

Corrupt politicians, sketchy police officers, a variety of terrible human traffickers and child exploiters the world over doing whatever the fuck they want, to whomever the fuck they want, whenever the fuck they want.

We have those refusing to do their job according to the law, and being paraded around like rock stars for it. those who can’t do one small task, and are being paraded around like criminals for it. Fake news, fake doctors, fake healthcare and fake help.

This was supposed to be the Golden Age of Humankind, striking out as one voice among the stars. Expanding our knowledge of ourselves in the cosmos, the inner space and the outer space.

What the fuck happened?

When did we lose our humanity? When did we become so terrible to each other that we would willingly tear down someone elses’ life because we didn’t agree with it?

When did cops – ALL cops – become the bad guy?

When did PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY become a hateful thing to say, let alone become an unpleasant aspect of life?

When did our society become so inhumane?

And how the fuck can we fix it?

Because I really don’t know. And I really, really want to.

Or else we are fucked.

A very August afternoon

I suppose I’m overdue for something pithy and full of vinegar.

Perhaps a smattering of smarmy, eye-winking, gum-smacking soliloquys carefully crafted to tickle your funny bone and lighten your loafers.

Better yet, an eloquent barrage of verbal velvet, gyrating languidly in the back of your pre-frontal cortex, abducting the daily doldrums out of their slumber, and into full on neural rave mode.

To finish, I could tie together the subtle and no so subtle poppity-pop culture club refs and riffs with swimmingly gentle ease and mighty mighty deft tone ninja reflexes.

The final parting shot, a clever rehash of the overall jive I’m laying down.

But I’m not going to do that.

To be honest, I realized I should probably put something up this month.

Here’s mud in your eye.

A Year of Living Anti-Sociably

So, it has been just over a year since i turned in my Facebook membership card.

My reasons were my own.

Surprisingly, I haven’t missed a thing. I think.

I have tried, and with some minor success, to increase my digital footprint in the Twittersphere. I skirted the Reddit Edge. I Skyped in words with a group of like-mindeds.

My blog has limped along at speeds that would give even the weakest of necks mild, barely perceptible whiplash.

I do feel like I might be a bit out of touch, but not in any of the really important ways.

I am writing in fits and starts. All of it is awesome, in my opinion, Even this. And this.

I guess I expected to have some kind of an epiphany, or that the experience would have a larger impact on me. But it hasn’t and didn’t.

I am, however, left with the reality that if I want to do something with my writing life, then I am going to have to commit to really putting myself out there.

Which may mean shaking hands with the Electronic Devil, and joining, or re-joining, certain social circles.

It’s mere speculation on my part of course, but if I do find myself having to consider the small print, to play wuth the user/privacy settings, and ascertain the relevance of my news feed items, then i will do so on my own terms and conditions.

It will be for my own reasons.

After all, membership has it’s privileges.

I hope.

ThreeSixFive

One year ago today, I was somewhere else.

And I’m still dealing with the after effects of the experience.

I have never considered myself someone who is easily jostled by the curve balls that life occasionally lobs my way.

But here I am, one year on, and I’m still dealing with it.

I don’t like to use the D word, because it fills me with unfair preconceived and inaccurate notions of weakness and limitation.

However, having recently decided to make whatever positive changes that are within my power to make, to put myself where I would rather be, I guess I recognize that it can only help me if I acknowledge what is going on, and has been going, for these last three hundred and sixty five days.

The truth is, I am depressed. Not in any easily diagnosed or readily solvable way. More like a “hurting to my core, feeling directionless and a variety of unhappy emotions” kind of way.

But this isn’t the end. Nor does it have to be. Every day that I move further and further away from the moment my depression began, I get closer and closer to the moment my depression will end.

And that is something to look forward to.

Obligatory Blog Post

I haven’t been on here much, and for that, I can only say  – so what?

I suppose it’s like that old addage “If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all”.

Or in my case “If you have nothing useful to say, no one is going to notice”.

I digress.

So, in the interests of waxing my own philosophic symbol, here are some funny things to ponder that I came up with when i typed it.

1) All people look funny when on the toilet.

2) When you get a song stuck in your head you hate, why not sing a different song?

3) In 2015, we are still more concerned about what other people are doing, and why it’s wrong, than education, or healthcare.

4) Despite all the terrible things human beings do to the world and each other, a dog will still ultimately trust an outstretched hand.

5) Look at a person in front of you. Now they are on the toilet. They do look funny, don’t they.

6) Why does no one in a zombie apocalypse movie go to a Bulk Barn?

7) What if Netflix is Skynet’s Final Solution?

8) As I typed that, the power went out in my neighbourhood, for one minute. Just let that sink in.

9) The bottled water industry is an elaborate charade to use up the left over Crystal Pepsi stock – one can for every skid of bottled water.

10) The person in front of you is still straining.

If you think this was great, just wait the Eleventy-Ninth of Procteebler, when I write about that thing behind you on the wall.

Reasonable Drought

Everything happens for a reason, as the saying goes.

All through our lives, we experience ups and downs, and twists and turns, that catch us off-guard and send us down unexpected paths.

How we react to these stimuli, is what generally determines our experience.

It is, to be fair, a challenge.

To keep our minds open and our spirits willing, to face the uncertain maelstrom of change, as it rips us from comfort and cozy, propelling us to new worlds, leaving us dripping in our undone sweaters on the welcome mat of the next moment.

And when we swivel our heads side to side, we see what we didn’t necessarily expect to, what we perhaps didn’t want to, and try as we might, we shake it off, and console ourselves with that most vague of comforting sayings:

“Everything happens for a reason”.

Yeah.

That has to be the stupidest, most chock full of horseshit statements EVER in the history of horseshit statements.

Very much akin to “finding something in the last place you look”.

Of course everything happens for a reason.  It’s cause and effect. Shit wouldn’t happen if shit didn’t cause it to happen. Most likely, the root cause of said shit is closely related to the irregular lump of putty staring back at you in the mirror.

Listen – something you did, you said, you thought, you felt, led you to this, whatever your “this” is.

If you don’t like where you ended up – go somewhere else.
Not crazy about your outlook – then look in.
Uncertainty creeping into your thought process- think differently!
Most importantly – feel ok about not feeling ok.

I am talking to and about myself, of course.

All of you (those following in real time, and those reading from the future) are just the lucky, lucky people that happen to be riding shotgun on this oh-de-lally little side trip of mine.

Listen – I haven’t had much to say lately, mostly because there was nothing I felt needed saying. Sometimes less is more, sometimes little is less.

Life goes on. Shit happens. Wherever you go, there you are.

Our collective experience is littered with jaunty Hallmark sayings perfectly designed to dull the ache of the long stretch of time we affectionately refer to as seconds, minutes, hours…..

Perhaps I just needed to wait for the snow to melt, for the sun to shine a little warmer and higher in the sky, and for the air to drift sweetly by, carrying the first whispers of a new spring.

Maybe I just needed to feel like I had something worth saying.

Quite possibly, I just needed a reason.

After all, everything starts to happen, when you have a reason.

This Post is Offensive

Readers be warned:

My words are chosen carefully. The innuendos, intended.

My jokes are almost always double entendres, and often mean more than one thing.

It is possible that what I write is not everyones’ cup of tea. My humour, is perhaps an acquired taste.

Maybe no one is paying attention. Maybe everyone is, somewhere in time.

That’s fine. I don’t mind, I can take it. I am a big boy. I have big shoulders. I don’t need people to like me.

But as the skipping record skips, it bears repeating.

The Constitution Act of 1867: Part 1 The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms:

Section 2: Fundamental Freedoms

Everyone has the following fundamental freedoms:

  • (a) freedom of conscience and religion;

  • (b) freedom of thought, belief, opinion and expression, including freedom of the press and other media of communication;

  • (c) freedom of peaceful assembly; and

  • (d) freedom of association.

Because everyone has a voice.  Every word, every expression is priceless. We are all just stories in the end.

And for now, I am exercising my freedom to say what I want, what i shouldn’t have to say.

So I’m going on the Offensive.

Je suis Charlie.