Ermagherd! Wrerter’s Blerk!

New project!!

2500 to 2800 word essay. Open concept. Cool topic. One that I am exceedingly comfortable with.

This the part of the movie where I hit the proverbial wall.

I gave myself a bit of time to suss out what direction i wanted to head in, but unfortunately, as with some of my early attempts at script writing, fits and starts are all I’m getting.

And here I find myself again, where fine ham abounds like a banquet of literary pork. That last sentence just slipped right out like a well hawked loogie. So did that one.

So more than anything, today’s morsel is more for me than you. It’s my warm-up. Just enough to get me moving forward.

There. I feel better already. Eyes on the prize. Ready to rock. Send me in, Coach. Totally, 100% foc- SQUIRREL!

Epic Flail…..

So It’s Summer again. Yay. The World keeps burnin’.

My two oldest have turned the wheel one more time and are cresting at 12 and 10, which, to be fair, blows my frickin’ mind.

How did I suddenly become a dad to almost teenagers? I barely qualify as an adult myself, let alone fulfill the required prerequisites for giving them the skinny on all-that-is-to-come….

Along the way, however, I recognize I must have not screwed it up to badly. All of my children appear to be relatively normal and well adjusted, emotionally and socially. They play. They fight. They laugh at farts. On the whole – normal.

And despite the near-insane lengths they seem to drive me from time to time, they are pretty good kids. I much prefer them to other children.

I just hope I can continue to not screw it up. Mind you, I haven’t forced them to choose between The Jedi or Starfleet, so the jury is still out. No kid should have to make a decision of that magnitude.



Somewhere, in some parallel universe, there is a version of me fastidiously hammering out golden streams of intellectual honeydew, blogging and tweeting to the throbbing masses, plucking snickers-level wordy goodness right out of the air.

Day in, as well as day out, this faster, sleeker, dare i say “streamlined” version of my very own self is manic and feverish, unleashing his critical think-funk upon the interweblets, undeterred by the regular life stuff tripping him up.

He is a virtuoso at time management. He is connected and tuned in. He is the epitome of bluetooth/wireless/virtual excellence. He is all of these things, and for good measure, keeps a potato peeler in his back pocket.

I happen to outshine him in two respects.

First, I am slightly funnier.

and secondly, I am way gooder with words and stuff.

I’ll try to be here more often.